Life without baby

1410284455522_wps_15_image001_pngThis post is dedicated to all the women who have been trying very hard to conceive and have not been able to have a child, for reasons which might be known or unknown.

First of all, I want to say that I used to be in the same boat. I used to think that not being able to have a child would be the biggest setback in my life. Why? Come to think of it, I cannot come up with a rational explanation to why I was thinking such a thing. Having a baby or not having one, is really a matter of chance. No matter how advanced science might be, we all know that a zillion factors need to work for a child to be born. That really does not make any woman less or more of a woman. What you are, what you can be and what you can do in this world, can never be determined by your ability to have or not have a child. Having a child is a wonderful experience, for sure. It makes you feel special. Not being able to have one, however, does not mean that you cannot have a wonderful life or not feel special.

It is important to think deeply about why you would want a child in the first place. Because you just do? You need a better answer. Bringing up a baby is a lifelong responsibility and if you are really up to it, know that there are many ways of gaining this responsibility. Adopting is a great way too. It is just the initial few months of experience that you miss…the rest stays the same. Pretty much the same.

Before you jump in, though, think about your work life and your personal life after a baby. Are you ready to reconsider every decision keeping in mind your baby? e.g. Going on a vacation..would the place you want to go to, be suitable for the baby? Or the things you want to buy for the house..would they still make sense with a baby around? Or the job you were thinking of taking up..would it still be possible with a baby? Think about it. Your life will change. Forever.

There are many women out there who have chosen to outsource the raising of their children to others in their house or nannies who might not even be completely trained. There are many women who are trying hard to shed the body weight they have put on after having a baby and may not be as much inclined to spend time thinking about what the child needs to now learn. There are many women who craved to have a child and were finally blessed with one, only to be separated from their husbands as the husband was unable to accept that the child was differently-abled. Many women are single and not married and are still happy. There are many couples without children who have adopted dogs and are happy.

The point being, there is merit in thinking about being happy today. A baby may or may not choose be a part of your life. Happiness does not need to wait till then..because even after having a baby, there are no guarantees. Life does not offer you any guarantees. The only thing it does offer, is a string of moments and loads of opportunities for you to create your happiness in those moments.

Cherish the moments you have..today. Live. With or without a baby.

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