With the kind of stress that corporate jobs tend to create, many men and women are choosing to opt out of the rat race to lead better lives. Studies have shown that one of the primary reasons that many women tend to opt out of their careers post having a child is the lack of support from the husband and the family in raising the child. Interestingly, there have been many cases recently, wherein women are moving to full time careers post having children while their husbands are choosing to take on parenting as a serious responsibility.
It is interesting to note that there is no longer a taboo associated with choosing to lead a life that allows one to focus on parenting. This holds good for both the parents. With the kind of changing climate conditions which bring with them new age diseases including many learning disorders, parents are left with limited options and are happy to move out of their full time jobs. Making such a fundamental shift, which impacts your day–to-day life, does entail some unique challenges. If you are such a spouse, who has chosen to take the plunge, you might fear that your decision could adversely impact your relationship with your spouse, albeit temporarily.
Some things that you can do to ensure that you preserve happiness are:
a) Make a list of all the things you and your spouse have wanted to do but have not been able to for lack of time. Include the mundane tasks, of course but also add some exciting ones, like planning a vacation and starting a fitness drive at home.
b) Find productive ways to be engaged through the day. Productive may not always mean you earn money out of it though it is hopefully something that will enable you to earn some money at some point in time. It is ok to invest your time to learn more about something that you want to do.
c) Make time for your social life. It is now time to contact all those long lost friends, meet your relatives and just hang out at some interesting networking events.
d) Don’t shy away from spending within a budget. Agreed that you are no longer in a full time job but denying yourself small pleasures can pull you down. If heavy expenses are something you would like to avoid, indulge in the less expensive things. Go low on money and high on time.
e) Pat yourself on the back for having made a tough call. Remind yourself every day why you chose to give up your job and do something to prove to yourself that you made the right decision.
At some point in time in our lives, the family we hail from, the premier schools we went to and the fat pay cheques we used to get, all seem irrelevant. What matters, at the end of the day, is happiness and peace and anything that leads us to that is justified. What say?
This post is a reproduction of my weekly column on ‘Relationships’ in The Goan (http://thegoan.net).